Has your family situation or your arrangements with your ex-partner changed? Arslan Advocaten helps clients from Haarlem with divorce, parenthood, maintenance and division of assets from our office in Amsterdam. We discuss which arrangements already apply, what has changed and which solution is legally and practically feasible.
This page is aimed mainly at parents who need clarity again after a divorce. Even if you still have to separate, it makes sense to think early about housing, work, school and the division of care. An arrangement only works well if you can carry it out in daily life.
When existing arrangements no longer work
A parenting plan is made for a particular situation. Later, a parent may get a different job, a child may move to another school or the travel distance may change. That does not automatically make the old arrangements invalid. It may, however, be a reason to review them together.
Start with a concrete overview. Which arrangement is getting stuck? How often does that happen? What is the effect on the child and what do you propose as an alternative? A practical description offers more to work with than the general conclusion that the other parent is not cooperating.
Keep the existing arrangement and relevant correspondence. Distinguish between occasional exceptions and a structural problem. If you agree on an adjustment together, it is important to record clearly whether it is temporary or permanent and how it relates to a court decision.
Dividing care between school, work and two homes
A care arrangement is about more than the number of nights with each parent. School hours, childcare, travel time, sport and moments of rest determine how a child experiences the arrangement. Also discuss who arranges transport and what happens if a parent is unexpectedly unavailable.
For a family from Haarlem, it may for example be relevant that a parent works or goes to live elsewhere. The legal assessment then turns on the concrete consequences of that distance, not on a general preference for a particular place. Support your proposal with a feasible weekly schedule and clear handover moments.
Work out holidays and public holidays separately. An equal division may be arranged differently in practice from the regular week. Also think about how you agree on dates and the latest time by which a request for a change must be made.
The interests of the child come first. That sometimes calls for a different solution from the division that looks most symmetrical for the parents on paper. We help you to organise the relevant circumstances and to formulate a proposal that fits the situation.
Moving with children after a divorce
A planned move can affect school, social contacts and contact with the other parent. With joint parental authority, consent to move with the child is an important point of attention. If there is no agreement, have it assessed in good time which procedure may be necessary.
Do not assume that a tenancy agreement or purchase agreement replaces consent. Even an understandable reason to move must be weighed against the consequences for the child and the other parent. The preparation and the proposed alternative for contact may be relevant in that respect.
Gather information about the reason for the move, possible housing alternatives, travel distances and the proposed care arrangement. Show how you intend to organise transport, costs and contact. This creates a concrete discussion about solutions instead of merely a conflict between moving and not moving.
Has the move already been announced or is it planned in the short term? Mention this immediately when you first contact us. The time available partly determines which steps are still possible. A general explanation online cannot replace consent or a court decision.
Parental authority and contact are different topics
Parental authority concerns responsibility and important decisions for a child. Contact and care concern the actual time spent with the child. These topics are related, but they are not the same. The question of which parent the child is registered with is also a separate point of attention.
A conflict about the choice of school may therefore call for a different solution from a conflict about a missed weekend. We start by establishing the legal situation and the existing arrangements. Bring any relevant court decision (beschikking) with you and have it checked how parental authority is arranged.
When communication is difficult, it can help to delimit topics and moments of contact. Describe, for example, how you share information about school or health. If a practical arrangement is not sufficient, we discuss which legal options suit the specific dispute.
Child maintenance with a different division of care
A change in care can also raise financial questions. Who pays which costs, and is the agreed maintenance amount still appropriate? That requires a calculation that takes account of the relevant circumstances of both parents and the child.
A change in income or expenses does not automatically lead to the amount that one parent considers reasonable. Arrangements about direct payments, special costs and any child account must also be clear. Otherwise a discussion arises about what was already included in the maintenance.
Do not stop a fixed payment on your own initiative because the other parent is not keeping to a care arrangement. Financial obligations and contact disputes must be dealt with carefully. We can discuss whether the arrangement needs to be adjusted and how you can substantiate that.
If the divorce still has to be arranged
In a new divorce, we also assess the home, assets, debts and any spousal maintenance. Your legal relationship is relevant here: marriage, registered partnership and cohabitation do not necessarily have the same consequences.
So record which agreements exist and which obligations you have entered into together. With a jointly owned or shared home, ownership, use and financing are separate questions. Where necessary, an arrangement between you must also be implemented with the mortgage lender or landlord.
A divorce petition is filed through a lawyer. Sometimes the parties can agree on a great deal themselves; sometimes a court has to make the decision. We discuss which points are ready for an agreement and which information is still missing. Also read about our wider assistance with family law.
How to prepare for the assessment
Make an overview of no more than a few main questions. Add the existing arrangement or court decision and note when the situation changed. Have you already received a proposal? Then send the full text, so that conditions and exceptions can also be assessed.
For financial questions, income details and existing calculations are useful. For a move, it concerns among other things the intended plan and the consequences for care. Where arrangements have not been kept, a factual timeline with concrete dates helps.
During the first contact, we discuss the next steps and which documents can be submitted securely. The engagement and the costs must also be clear in advance. The scope depends on whether advice, negotiations or proceedings are needed.
Frequently asked questions about family law in Haarlem
From which office does Arslan help clients from Haarlem?
You can contact us through our office in Amsterdam. We discuss your request for help and tailor the appointment and the handling of your case accordingly. Mention any hearing date or other running time limit straight away.
Can a parenting plan be changed?
Yes, but the existing arrangements do not change automatically. First see whether agreement is possible and record new arrangements clearly. If consultation does not succeed, it can be assessed whether a court decision is necessary and possible.
May I move because I have a different job?
A new job can be a relevant reason, but it does not automatically give permission to move with a child. Among other things, parental authority, the care arrangement and the consequences for the child must be considered. Have this assessed before you make irreversible arrangements.
What if the other parent keeps changing arrangements?
Note which arrangements apply, which changes are requested and what effect they have. This makes it possible to consider whether clarification, consultation or legal action is appropriate. A substantiated overview helps to identify the real bottleneck.
Does maintenance change automatically if my child is with me more often?
No. A different division of care may, however, be a reason for a new assessment. Have the link with income, costs and the existing arrangement calculated and record any change.
Can we seek advice together?
That can be discussed as a first question. The lawyer must assess whether joint guidance suits the interests and circumstances. If your interests are opposed, it is important that you know who is acting exclusively for you.
Would you like your arrangements assessed?
Contact Arslan Advocaten. Mention that you live in Haarlem and indicate whether it concerns a new divorce, an existing care arrangement, a move or maintenance. That way, the first consultation can be prepared in a targeted manner.