Has your family situation changed, or are earlier arrangements no longer working after a divorce or separation? Arslan Advocaten helps clients from Zoetermeer with divorce, maintenance and arrangements concerning children. Assistance is provided through our office in The Hague. Together we determine what needs to be settled legally and what is workable in practice.
Discuss your situation with Arslan Advocaten. Mention straight away if a deadline is approaching.
Family law when your situation is new or has changed
A family law question does not have to start with a new divorce. Even years later, care, income or living circumstances can change. An arrangement that used to be suitable may then no longer fit. That does not mean existing arrangements lapse automatically. First, it must be assessed what has been laid down and why a change is considered necessary.
So always bring the existing agreement, the parenting plan and any court orders. Indicate which parts are working well and where problems arise. A targeted question, such as adjusting a handover time or a maintenance calculation, does not have to lead straight away to a discussion of all earlier arrangements.
When a divorce is being considered, by contrast, we map out the full picture: the form of your relationship, children, the home, assets, debts and income. The legal consequences of a marriage are not necessarily the same as those of cohabitation. The starting point is therefore your own situation, not a standard list that produces the same outcome for everyone.
Divorce: what do you arrange first?
Distinguish between temporary arrangements and the final settlement. Who stays in the home for the time being, how are costs paid and how is the care of the children organised? Such arrangements can bring some calm while financial documents are gathered. Record clearly for which period the arrangement applies and which issues are still open.
A lawyer is required to file a divorce petition with the court. The route depends in part on whether the parties can make arrangements jointly or disagree on certain points. A unilateral petition does not rule out consultation later on. On our page about divorce you will find more background on the formal steps.
With an overall proposal, pay attention to how the parts fit together. A lower monthly contribution may, for example, be combined with a different division of costs or assets. That needs to be examined properly from a legal and financial perspective. You must be able to understand what an arrangement means today and what happens if circumstances change.
A care arrangement that suits children and parents
An arrangement concerning children is more than a division of overnight stays. School, work, travel time, holidays and the possibilities of both parents all play a part. Start with the normal weekly rhythm and then add exceptions. A schedule with clear times and responsibilities reduces the risk of differing expectations.
For parents from Zoetermeer, a new home in another town can affect whether the care arrangement remains feasible. Describe specifically how much travel time this creates and how picking up and dropping off will be arranged. A parent’s preference is not the same as a reasoned assessment of the child’s interests. Also explore alternatives that support contact with both parents.
Agree how you will share important information and report practical changes. Think of messages from school, medical appointments and activities. It is useful to distinguish between what is shared for information only and what requires consultation or consent. Make communication as workable as possible, even if contact between you is strained.
Changing existing arrangements concerning children
If an arrangement no longer works, first describe what has changed since the earlier agreement. Is it about different working hours, the child’s age, school or recurring problems in putting it into practice? Collect factual examples and avoid general characterisations of the other parent. The reason for a change must be verifiable.
A fictitious example: a handover had been agreed for a free afternoon, but a new school timetable means that is no longer possible. A targeted adjustment may then be sufficient. That is a different question from completely revising the division of care. By defining the problem clearly, consultation can be better prepared.
If parents cannot reach agreement, an assessment by the court may be necessary. The Dutch judiciary (Rechtspraak) describes the procedure concerning care and contact. The legal requirements and the child’s interests determine which requests are appropriate. Proceedings are no guarantee that the proposed schedule will be adopted.
Maintenance when income or care changes
A new job, loss of work, a change in care or other relevant circumstances may be a reason to have a maintenance arrangement examined. However, the amount does not change automatically with every change. The original assumptions, the current figures and the legal options for adjustment must be looked at.
So do not just send your latest payslip, but also the earlier calculation and the court order or agreement. Mention other maintenance obligations and relevant income. With a fluctuating income, several periods are needed to obtain a reliable picture. A gross amount on a payslip does not in itself show what someone can afford to pay in maintenance.
Do not stop paying on your own initiative because you think the amount is too high. First discuss consultation, a recalculation and, if necessary, a petition for variation. The possible effective date also deserves attention. The Dutch judiciary’s website explains the maintenance procedure. We translate the options to your case.
Who stays in the home and who pays?
Use of the home, ownership and financing are separate issues. A temporary arrangement that one partner stays in the home does not automatically settle the final division or liability for the mortgage. Make clear separately who pays which costs and how those payments will be dealt with later.
With an owner-occupied home, the value, the mortgage debt, any contribution from private funds and whether a takeover can be financed are important. A bank is not automatically bound by arrangements between partners. So investigate in good time whether release from liability and a takeover are possible. Also record what happens if financing fails and the home has to be sold.
With a rented home, we look at the tenancy agreement and the legal position of both partners. An oral assurance that someone ‘may keep the rented home’ does not provide sufficient certainty. Arrangements about the deposit, arrears and moving out must also fit the legal situation. Let us know if the landlord has already sent letters or if a notice of termination has been signed.
Dividing assets without missing important items
A division starts with a complete overview. In addition to bank accounts and the home, think of loans, insurance policies with a value, possessions, tax debts and pension. Which items have to be shared depends on the form of your relationship and your agreements. Do not assume that each of you automatically gets half without checking the legal basis.
With gifts, inheritances and payments from private assets, supporting evidence can be important. Collect deeds, bank statements and agreements made. The aim is to reconstruct what was contributed and on what terms. If evidence is missing, it must be discussed what uncertainty this creates and what solution is possible.
Broadly worded final clauses deserve attention. If you declare that you have no further claims against each other, it must be clear which issues have actually been examined. Record a still uncertain tax assessment or other open item explicitly instead of assuming that it will sort itself out later.
Parental authority, consent and a planned relocation
Questions about parental authority are not the same as disputes about day-to-day care. First it must be established who has legal parental authority. It can then be assessed which decisions require consent or consultation. Think of important choices about school, residence or certain medical decisions.
With a planned relocation, early advice makes sense. Not only the distance counts, but also the consequences for the child, contact and the implementation of arrangements. Prepare alternatives and discuss consent before irreversible practical steps are taken. A signed tenancy agreement does not make legal consent unnecessary.
If the situation is international, state straight away where the parents and children live, which nationalities are involved and whether there are foreign decisions. The competent court and the applicable law may raise additional questions. Do not simply use a standard arrangement from an entirely Dutch situation for this.
Urgency, safety and court documents received
Sometimes a temporary decision about the home, the children or essential payments has to be made quickly. State specifically what cannot wait and what consequences arise. We look at whether a temporary arrangement is possible or whether an application to the court should be considered. The right route depends on the procedure and the circumstances.
If you receive court documents, forward all pages and the date of receipt. A time limit for responding may be running while consultation continues. So have it assessed separately what must be filed in time. Do not assume that a promise by telephone from the other party has automatically extended all time limits.
In case of immediate danger, safety comes first; call 112. For the further legal approach, we discuss which facts and protection options are relevant. Sensitive information about children or medical circumstances is collected selectively. An unsorted stream of private messages usually helps less than a factual timeline with relevant examples.
Assistance from The Hague and agreements on costs
For clients from Zoetermeer, assistance is provided through our office in The Hague. We discuss which question needs to be dealt with first, who will handle the case and which work falls within the engagement. Assistance begins with a check for possible conflicts of interest and clear agreements.
The costs depend on the advice, consultation and any proceedings. Subsidised legal aid may be available under certain conditions; income, assets and the nature of the case must be considered. External costs, such as court fees, may also play a part. Ask in advance how changes in the scope of the work will be discussed.
For the first meeting, bring your most important documents and three specific questions. That way the assessment can focus on what is needed now. You will find more background on the various topics under family law. You can mention an existing document or a new letter in your request, so that the urgency is clear straight away.
Frequently asked questions about family law in Zoetermeer
Can an old care arrangement be changed?
That can be examined if the arrangement is no longer suitable. We look at what has changed, which arrangements exist and whether consultation or an application to the court is needed.
Does maintenance automatically go down if my income falls?
No. Have the consequences of the change calculated and assessed. An existing amount should not be adjusted unilaterally without further assessment.
Can I just ask for advice before I decide to divorce?
Yes. An advisory meeting can clarify what consequences and choices there are. You do not need to have already made a final decision about the divorce.
May I move with my child?
That depends, among other things, on parental authority and the circumstances. Have the required consent and the consequences for the care arrangement assessed before you enter into specific commitments.
Can you assist me from Zoetermeer?
Yes. Your case is handled through The Hague. We agree how consultations will take place and which documents are needed for your specific question.
Request an assessment of your situation. We discuss the next steps and the agreements on costs.